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Thursday, August 12, 2010

Inspiration

There are lots of things that inspire me, from a book that might spark an imagination that I totally forgot I had to a person who pushes me to an achievement. I was inspired by a senior in my high school who could just run, even around a track, something that I had a difficult and hard time doing. She would finish before me, alot before me, and would stand on the in field and encourage me to finish and not stop. I was inspired by an unexpected pregnancy to become a mom, something I never wanted to be. My favorite was when a woman I didn't know allowed me to show my abilities by putting me on a horse. Inspiration!!!! It became more than an inspiration it became a love. I took alot of miss directed anger and insecurity and found a thing that became part of a life that drew out that part of me that I hid for so very long. I was inspired to become something I had never imagined would happen, a horseman (or horsewoman). Its funny how different things inspire us at times that are the most unusual.

This morning I was not inspired, I was - for a brief moment- very happy, then in the blink of an eye, I became very overwhelmed with anger. In the literal blink of an eye, a person I never met, turned my day inside out. Is that considered inspiration? I think on some level that's true. At some point of anger there has to be inspiration for that issue, thing, or person, to drive me to anger. Don't you think? So immediately my good morning turned to a morning full of inspiration - I have to say that I like inspiration much better than anger, don't you? So it began, like most things that inspire me, I am thrwarted to writing. So started my email (one I haven't sent yet) to an unknown character in the world. See this morning I was set on a course to defend my actions of allowing Lizzie to live with us but a family member who has never met me and, I'm sure, has only heard of me from other family members. And believe you me I was on the rampage but in an elegant way of words. I explained solely that who I was to this unknown person, from being a mother and wife to being a confident to my daughters, to being the one who pushes Lizzie to stay in contact with her family. And about the time I was ready to hit "send" I got a text message.
"Deuteronomy 4:31. Read it. Like now!" It was a message alert that Jennifer put on her facebook wall in the middle of the day. So out of sheer curiosity, I looked it up. "For the Lord your God is a merciful God, he will not abandon or destroy you, or forget the covenant with your forefathers, which he confirmed to them by oath." This book of the Bible I have never read! I mean parts and pieces and I know it has some of the story of Moses and the Isrealites, but I don't know much about this part of the Bible. So I read a little before to figure it out. And I believe it is the time when Moses was getting forgiveness for the Isrealites sin of creating a golden calf to idolize and he is reminding the people of the mercy of God because of a convenant that God had with their forefathers. Why was this inspiring? Well first of all it came at a moment when I was ready to tell the unknown person why the 'real' world wouldn't want to be come or having anything to do with Christians because of the actions of this person and her extended family - who are pronounced Christians. It came at a moment when I needed to be inspired by God, and He did a good job getting to me through my daughter, Jennifer, at high school, in the middle of the day. I was inspired, to know that God is merciful, and no matter what one person believes or says, He knows the heart of the matter. I was inspired by the drive of my daughter to be closer and closer to God and through that she drives me closer and closer. I was inspired to allow mistakes and show compassion for a convenant that was made with God when I was saved and He will stand by His convenant with me.

So I was inspired today, but not so much as I thought by the person unknown but by my child who has a heart for God and got to me through a text message. What inspires you? Do you know? And can you identify it daily? I'm getting better and learning that more inspires me daily than I think.


today- form of a 16 yr old high school junior

deuteronomy 4:31

reason

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